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Thursday, August 26, 2010

a broken heart


Seek My face, and I will share My mind with you, opening your eyes to see things from My perspective. Do not let your heart be troubled, and do not be afraid. The peace I give is sufficient for you...... Jesus Calling.

Gwen and I decided to take our little ones to the park on Tuesday. The weather in Nashville is starting to become a little cooler. (We are beckoning it!) We unloaded our vans and they scattered with squeals of excitement! I followed mine to the slides and was quickly approached by a woman that asked "what daycare are you with?" I replied "no maam, we are not a daycare, they belong to us" (all the while my almost 5 year old son, Joshua, is standing right beside me listening to EVERY word) and she said "do you foster them or something?!" and I said "no, they belong to us, we have adopted them" (Joshua's eyebrows are furrowed, looking up at me, at this point wondering how I will respond) "REALLY?!?!? what for?" and I continued my conversation with the lady, trying to have grace, but choosing my words wisely because obviously Joshua was hanging on to my every word. I grabbed Joshua's little hand in mine and led him to a different part of the playground. As I approached Gwen, she could tell that I was seething. We talked through our parts as adoptive Mommy's to spread awareness of adoption, while sheltering our children from the rudeness of the outside world. The look on the lady's face was one of disgust. She did not understand and didn't really want to try. My heart ached for Joshua. My heart felt burdened for the rest of the day. I know that the Lord has me on this journey so that I will call out to him daily. As I left the park, I spoke aloud to Christ..."I do not know how you were able to sit on your throne and watch you son be persecuted time AFTER TIME while He was living on earth. " (Honestly, if I had the power to throw down some lightening on some people, there would be several that would be burnt to a crisp by now!)
I am so thankful that God has me in a place where I can not only see his heart, but feel the pain that he feels for his sweet children.

Do not worry about what other people think of you. The work that I am doing in you is hidden at first. But eventually blossoms will burst forth, and abundant fruit will be borne. Stay on the path of Life with Me. Trust Me wholeheartedly, letting My spirit fill you with joy and peace. Galatians 5:22-23

31 comments:

Kelly L said...

I'm so sorry for your awful encounter! You son is so handsome! How anyone could say such awful things in front of children never ceases to amaze me! Thank you for the verse today I needed that so much today! ((hugs))

RaVae Erickson said...

Oh Suzanne,
Stories like this are just so disgusting! If you truly want to know and are interested to learn about the heart of someone who adopts fine, but to ask questions just to be rude (and when the child is standing RIGHT THERE!) My heart breaks for YOU dear Suzanne. I am praying for you today. I am so thankful we have a God who is WITH US at EVERY moment.

Anonymous said...

Hi Suzanne - I don't think I've ever actually posted a comment but this seems like a good post to comment on. I'm really very sorry that people can't be more considerate. I started reading your blog after finding Kate's. Your story is amazing and so are your kids. You are all so loving and beautiful. I have to tell you I'm usually one to shy from religious topics but I have been so entraced with both Katie's story and yours. And, truly touched by the Christ like love you show. Maybe that woman needed her eyes opened and you were just the tool for that. God Bless. Rachel

Lands Family Led by the Lord said...

Yes, my sister I hear you. I am also an adopitve mother and the comments some people have said to me. Hurtful, none of their busy comments. I have learned for the protection of my children to sweetly tell them I would be happy to share what the Lord is doing in our lives through adoption. Please,feel free to call me at home when it is a more convenient time for me to talk. Right now I am tending to my children. In silence people walk away... and I pray....thanking the Lord for my family..

Blessings in Christ,
Virginia

natali said...

praying for your sweet self and your children, that He would give you grace to keep going on this journey no matter the stares and the comments. they don't matter. only He does. and He is proud of you. :)

Corby and Lauren said...

That just made me sweat a little! :) You handled that with much more grace than I probably would have! I love reading about your love for adoption and hope to some day add to my family... and in turn look more like a daycare!

Lauren
(Lindsey Wheeler's sister)

**Heidi** said...

I don't understand how or why people act the way and say the horrible things they say sometimes...it makes me angry and sad for them all at the same time!!!!

James 1:27 Family said...

I'm with you. I get the rudest comments everywhere we go.... the grocery store, the library, CHURCH, sports, and on and on. You are right. I dig deep within and find no strength to be nice. So I go where I know the only source of grace is... at the Cross. He knows, He hears, He's holding our little ones. It seems from the outside that we can't change these people. They are so rude, so ignorant, so mean... so willing to say something hurtful right in front of my child! But, Jesus can change them. We're just planting seeds.

I feel your sadness and your anger and I'm walkin' this road with you. Sending hugs and love.

Thank you for sharing about your day. It helps so much when we let each other know about days like this, so that we know we're not alone! :)

Much love in Jesus,
Amy

Kristi J said...

so well said...i feel your pain girly!! :) kj

Shauna said...

One of my biggest challenges has been to keep my tongue in those moments. I really struggle that way. Way to go! You are an encouragement to me!

Lyndsay said...

Suzanne,
My husband and I are in the process of adopting a daughter from Ethiopia who is HIV+. We have been having the discussion about whom we tell. It is so hard because we want to protect our child, but we also want to make people aware of what is right and true and good. The verse that God continues to bring me back to is Romans 8:31 "And what then shall in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us?
We know that in this world the enemy and other people will always be against us and our children, but even though it hurts sometimes we have the ever present knowledge that God is for us! God is for our children! He is using your family to change peoples hearts! Our God is so big and we all have stories of how He has orchestrated our lives, and our adoptions.
Thank you so much for sharing your heart with us! You are a gift from above, and God is for you, and so am I! :)
Have a blessed day!

Deb said...

My head just exploded. On behalf of ignorant people everywhere (at times, self included) I am so sorry. For Joshua, I'm sorry. UGH!!

Jim and April said...

amen sister...your right about how if we had the power to throw down lightening, how many people would be burnt...that just goes to show the MASSIVE amount of compassion, grace and mercy our God has for us!

Anonymous said...

I think you are amazing! Thru yours and Katie's blog my heart has been stricken with the need to help orphans. I hope one day to be able to adopt just as you have. God bless you and your adorable family!

Kendra said...

I know this is soo hard and I want you to know that you are such a leader and teacher for soo many. I think probably every adopting parent wonders how he/she will handle conversations like this and the hard part....it's always thrown in your face, blind-siding you without time to think. I wish I had a kind reason for every one. Truth is...I NEVER do! So by your example you are helping me to learn what I will do when our baby comes home. She deserves for me to have good, quick, kind answers on her behalf. Thank you for sharing (don't you wish sometimes you had your most blunt, outspoken friend with you at that moment?:0)

Kendra

"Are These Kids All Yours?" said...

Sometimes......oooohhhhh....just gets to me. I always say inside my head- you should be thankful I am a God Follower...otherwise.....well I might say things I shouldn't. So hard....sometimes. Then there are other times when you know God is really moving in someone's heart for the orphan....and you just know they are really seeking. That AMAZES ME! Sometimes- when it is hard....I repeat Grace, grace, grace, grace, grace.......Praying for that woman right now.....because well that is our calling.

MOMSWEB said...

What a blessing you are to share the reality of your heart in that situation. As I read the woman's comments, I thought to myself...Father forgive them for they know not what they do...OR SAY!

Continue being a light for the world!

Our family said...

Thanks for sharing this. A GREAT reminder NOT to care about what other people think. It makes me REALLY sad that people feel like they can share their "opinions" so BOLDLY without considering the precious little boy standing right beside you. We are encountering "opinions" around here too and I have to pray and pray for LOTS of grace as I respond and I pray often that God will guard the hearts of our children and to help them know the TRUTH about who they are in Jesus. Thankful for families like you!
rebekah wright

jennifer said...

totally love to read the scripture you quote ...what version Bible do you use? LOVE LOVE LOVE your family...some people will never get it but who knows what that seed you planted will do if nothing else it will make her more careful of her tongue

love said...

oh, suzanne. yes, the anger & frustration that these encounters can bring. with our children's precious ears right there. sigh.
what a sad life that lady leads. may a seed have been planted to open her eyes and heart.

your family is seriously one of the most beautiful i've ever seen. come on, sister!!

emily said...

Oh man, such hard stuff. I know you handled it with grace, but I would have been right there with you seething. Love you!

The McBs said...

I needed this today.... just blogged briefly about a situation today.... thanks...

Sophie said...

I love that Bible verse.
I've heard some pretty rude comments too and it's so hard to remain calm at times.
Some people don't get it because they just don't get Christ. I pity them, they don't know what they're missing.

Tracy said...

I would be livid also. It's hard when you're so passionate about something and others don't understand :(

Christie said...

Well, I cried my way through this post...because I'm so been there. I just got asked if I was running a daycare.

More so, I'm with you - how did the Heavenly Father do it?

sigh...sniffle

Beautiful Mess said...

Wow! God bless...

Janet said...

Did you know that praise confuses the enemy? Praise God! Start praising Him now! Praise Him loud! Praise Him with the passion that you have for your children! Praise Him so that your children can hear you! Praise Him so that your children will join you in your praise!

HUGS,

Janet
www.homeward4.blogspot.com

Polly said...

Way to go classy mama! We are all learning from your example of showing grace

Meliski said...

This brought tears to my eyes. Angry tears for the woman's rudeness. Sad tears for her ignorance at what she is missing. And tears for your little man. I am sure you convey to him in words and actions every day how much he is loved and what a valuable member of the family he is!

Heather, Rick, and Tendai! said...

I have just started reading your blog, but I love it already!... as adoptive parents living in africa we often get questions- many people where we live (rural mozambique) cannot fathom that WE are HER parents!! Most however are not rude about it, they just dont understand.
Often times they will say "where is that childs mother?"
I respond.. "I am this childs mother".. then i wait... about two seconds later they usually say something like this..
"You are a liar!!! Your skin is not the same!!!" ( take into account we live deep in the bush and adoption is not a common thing... i am not offended by these comments.. and when i take into account the portuguese phrasing and the accompanying facial expressions they generally make me laugh out loud!)
For the last week however we have been in South Africa, where despite many leaps forward, there is still alot of racial division and misunderstanding. A (white) lady in the store came up to me and told me "(i) would be blessed for taking in one of "them" as she nodded towards my daughter. Man did that get me. I calmly replied that every child, orphaned or not, black, or white skinned, was in need of a home, and I was thrilled God allowed me to be her parent. Every day here I choose to ignore looks and comments- I know how annoying and hard it can be. Every once and awhile it gets to me, but im trying to remember that some people are just ignorant to how they come across, some honestly dont realise they are being rude and are simply curious, and for those who do realise- maybe someone I take the time to calmy speak with in Love will have their heart softened even just a little bit towards the plight of those who need our love and caring most of all.
Blessings On you as you continue your journey with you entire family! You are truly an inspiration!

sara @ it's good to be queen said...

wow. wow. i truly do not understand some people. I can't fathom why she would ask "why?" I don't know how I respond to that other then "what do you mean why?" We keep a little girl in our home a few days a week and on weekends, etc. She has a really horrible home life so we try to bring some light into her little life. Wish I could keep her! Anyhow, I get all kinds of questions. It's almost like people feel they have a right to know everything. "Are you babysitting? Why do you have her? Whose little girl is that? Are you fostering?" etc. It's like they must put her in a box otherwise they can't understand why this little white woman is carting around a little black girl. I wish it was more the norm instead of the exception.
blessings,
Sara

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suzanne
I am a lover of Jesus. I have the most fabulous husband that anyone woman could ask for. The Lord has blessed us with 7 beautiful children. I started this blog so that friends and family could follow our trip to Uganda to visit Katie Davis. I have decided to keep blogging to help bring orphan awareness to the world around me.
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