My cell phone just buzzed...a text from my husband: "I think your account is empty" which is his sweet way of saying that I have bounced a few checks. This isn't the first time that this has happened, thankfully, I have an overdraft protection on my checking account.

When I read his text, my mind automatically went to "well, so is my emotional account, my energy account, and my spiritual account!" hahahha. I don't know about you guys, but we had a FABULOUS Christmas. I LOVE being with family and eating! I took Josie back to the doctor, we had a few days back in school (just enough to get good and tired and cranky during the transition back into school bedtimes, tests, etc....) and BAM! the snow hit. So, four days straight of more eating and TONS of friends to play with. I have not seen my pantry as cleaned out in YEARS...down to the bare bones! My party is definitely pooped!

I woke up yesterday at 5:30am and took my computer into my laundry room so that I could listen to some worship music while folding laundry. I was dreading the task, so I thought "I'll just worship while I work...after all, who can be grumpy while worshipping?" As each child came down the stairs, I found myself turning my music up louder and louder. (My children do not wake up slowly, they wake up with a BURST of energy BOUNCING down the stairs...much to my dismay.) If they were calling, I sure didn't hear, I was singing "Our God" by Chris Tomlin, hanging on to EVERY word of it. In the back of my mind, I had decided that I am not REALLY called to this life that I am leading. And if I am called to it, then maybe I am making it more complicated that it has to be. So, I start thinking through my days, trying to "weed out" the parts that make it difficult. Slowly but surely I had weeded out everything that made life difficult, along with those difficult things were my happiness and joy.

As I continued to search my heart I realized all of these things that our culture views as a "calling" are actually DEMANDS that Christ has given us as followers of him. I was reminded that IF I am a true follower of Him, then I cannot pick and choose what scriptures I will apply to my life. I cannot love my neighbor (because thats easy to do ) then decide that I am not called to all nations. He has not called me to go to all nations; He has created us and commanded us to go to all nations. I cannot say that I am not called to care for orphans and widows when we KNOW that He commands that of us, and then apply Matthew 11:28 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest" to my life because I am SO VERY TIRED.

David Platt (RADICAL) does a great job of explaining how we have drawn a line of distinction, assigning the obligations of Christianity to a few while keeping the privileges of Christianity for us all. His book talks about how when Jesus summarized his life here on earth, He didnt relive all of his great sermons,the miracles he performed, or feeding thousands of people with minimal food. Instead, he talks REPEATEDLY about the disciples that he spent most of his time with. The main people that he invested his life in here on earth. He LOVED these men! And they DID not always make it easy on him! Judas was lost for heaven's sake. Jesus poured so much time and energy into him and he FORSAKE him!! who DOES that?!! His last words to his disciples were to "go make disciples." Making disciples is NOT easy. It is yucky, slow and tedious..because it is relational. There is no formula to make life easy. Jesus has SIMPLY given us people and said "live for them. Love them, serve them, and lead them. Lead them to follow me, and lead them to lead others to follow me.

So, when I am defeated. When my life is cluttered and has MOUNDS of laundry in it....am I loving? am I serving? and am I leading? Keeping things in perspective. That is my goal for 2011...perspective.